Interludes in 5/7/5

List

I sat myself down

Made a silly little list

'Bout what I would do

Time

If I had the time.

O and what all would I do

If I had the time?

Be

Sprawl out on the porch

Soak in the warm honeyed light

Breeze stroking my cheek

Read

Curl 'top a cushion

Book in hand my only care

Feline- perfect ease

Pray

Drop down- bended knee

Talking, yes- mostly list'nin

Whisp'rin, "Beautiful"

Steal a Kiss

Press me close to you

Brush impatient lips on yours

Savor the promised

Dance

Swaying, bobbing beat

Royal- ruling this body:

Palm tree in fierce breeze

Laugh

Wee ripple rising

Mirth a spreading thing like weed

Full grown, bursts brilliant

Worship

Emptied hands lifted

Face raised- soakin' in glory

I hear, "You are mine."

Walk the Dog

Only purpose- be

outside, sniff everything, pull

against too short leash

Afternoon Coffee

Sweet bulbous curve of

warm mug weighty on cupped hand

bitter-sweet relief

Hike

Enveloping hush

Broken by sole meeting stone

And deepening breath

Foster

Open door, hands, heart

Sweet refuge and healing place

Welcome here, broken 

Write

Exhale emotion

Paint the past in gilded light

Record what should be

Find the Time

Cease endless running

Demand nothing-important

Be declared vital

Runaway

Today was just one more day in a string
Of days full of responsibilities
Fulfilling expectations, like I should
Checking off obligations one by one
When the ever present niggle,
Little back-brain tickle daydream
Grew up in a hurry.
Fantasy to fascination to fixation.

I want to run away with you.
I need that sweet pleasure of only. Just. Nothing but
You.

'Cause I'm deep down achy bone weary
From forcing myself to focus
On day to day. Mundane. Important. Other than's.
So much energy devoted to not you-ing.

The gaurd over my mouth has been wearing thin.
All those rushing, tumbling hopes.  Desire repressed. Unspoken truths.
Simmering up to my lips.
Let the pot boil over.

My hands are complaining 'bout pressing to my sides.
Restrained behind my back.
Clasped together in my lap
For moral support.
Begging for freedom to roam.
Open pasture.

And, O! O two rebellious lips
Weary with mandatory smiling and lonliness
Are poised to pose into a spoiled pout.
Whispering 'bout mutiny.

Saguaro Blossoms

Whizzing north on the 17
Pandora blasting and the girls and I
screaming along
all tone-deaf enthusiasm 
shouting out the lyrics we know
and mumbling the rest

I've got one hand on the wheel
cruise control set to 79
It's only Spring- late April
and the heat's already
started falling down

on this hellish valley

It lends a little desperation
An anxious urgency
the exhilaration of escape
the thrill of running away
to our adventure up the mountain
towards the cool and the pines

Even the desert is celebrating
right along with us
all that sharp and thorny
gray-green and inhospitable
threatening, intimidating flora
has burst into bloom

We're flying past
saguaro after saguaro
and those fat prickly things
formidable old maids
that nobody could love
are wearing white blooms

Encircling their heads 
like crowns, like wreaths
blossoms grace their outstretched arms
and I realize they're all brides
even the saguaro has her day
to be lovely

To be loved

Walls

I can feel them
creeping up
just like they used to
those walls
o the walls
'cause it's so hard
it's just so scary
to care so much
so long
so hard
and not be sure

and, don't worry,
I'm working on
talking myself
out of it
'cause I know
I do know that
I can't have you
and have my
impenetrable wall
and I want you
o, I do
don't I?

So I build
and I tear down
a brick up
two bricks down
a few more laid
another destroyed
and while I construct
and deconstruct
I wonder
I plan
how high?
how tall?
leave a gate?
a door?
just a window?
or no entrance at all?

Me and Today

All 'lone all 'lone all 'lone.
It's not what it was, but it's still something, right?
Right?
So why do I feel so lonely.
Solitary.
                                                                                                         Set. Apart.
Is it my fault, 'cause I insist on skippin' from peaks to valleys
without stopping at all the places in between?
Dizzy crescendos
or days thick with time like molasses.

Mom asks, "Isn't it tiring
to feel
as much as you feel?"

It is.
It's exhausting.
Worse than that.
It's lonely.
'Cause ain't nobody coming with me.
Who's coming with me?

I thought it was gonna be you.

And it was. 

For a while. 

Running up and down those peaks. 

Soaring and crashing. Crashing and soaring. 

So sweet to have a somebody to travel with. 

'til you stepped back

just like you did

that time before.

You play it just like that old song. 

Two hops forward. Too fast. 

One back. 

Enough of that until

I ended up down here all 'lone. 

And you, you're busy

studying maps,

highlighting trails,

collecting supplies,

and planning for contingencies. 

One days. Somedays. Maybes.

But there's only today

up there

down here. 

Just me and today. 

Urges

got the urge to graffiti,  no surface is safe
JR all in hearts all over each notebook
our names linked up on the trunk of each tree
love poems 'bout longing on arched tunnel walls
your face spray painted on the side of a train

got an overwhelming urge for public proclamation
choose I LOVE JASON! as my Facebook status
Kate and Jason on every billboard 'tween here and Texas
drape a banner off the side of each highway overpass
invest in a sleeve of tattoos of your name

got an urge to give up the rest just to chase you
quit my jobs, clear my schedule, fill it only with you
spend my days dreamin' 'bout loving you better
run away to Tahiti where we can stroll on the sand
or just to a playground, we can swing on the swings

You've Gotta Get Out

you've gotta get out
of my spinning thoughts
'cause I can't focus
and I can't finish nothin'
my mind's a whir o maybe and someday and please
I've got bills to pay
and lessons to plan
and laundry to sort
and homeschool to grade
and conversations to be present in, list'nin

you've gotta get out
of my tumbled dreams
'cause I wake up more
tired than I lay down
runnin' round all night long just to find you just to
hold your hand and heart
squeeze next to you close
not to mention all those
other things I can't
mention 'cept to say they'll happen one day, some day

you've gotta get out
of all those duties
that keep you miles
away from me and
so busy working and learning and parenting
and wrapped up in things
that aren't me mine me
everyone pullin'
you to-fro, back-forth
and come on back to stay, just playin' house with me